Today is my fourth day without a drink, and the first one that I actually wanted one. I think it is because I am bored and stressed more than wanting the drink.
Last night and this morning I had a really good feeling. I felt good about things. That all changed about 10:30, and everything I did this afternoon just broke my heart.
Then I get back to my Mom's house, where it is just me and my daughter, and quiet and lonely. I think I am having small anxiety attacks on top of my crying fits. I also think I screwed up my eye from too much crying if that is possible...of course it might be from the other reason, either way it looks like it is bleeding.
I am a mess. I want to just go to bed and cry myself to sleep, but have to be strong for K.